Dear Tinkerbell,
Can Kelly Osbourne be any more pathetic? She is telling everyone and anyone that I poisoned her! Apparently, at Noir last week, she turned to a whole crew of people and said " [Paris] gave me my first alcohol poisoning". Oh, spare me. I can hardly believe that the post-rehab daughter of Ozzy Osbourne experienced her first incidence of alcohol poisoning any time recently nor can I believe that I could possibly have had anything to do with it.
And why does she have to say it like I injected it in her? Or slipped it in her drink? Like, she left to use the ladies room and I slipped a shot of rum in her Coke. Please. All I plan on giving her is a couple of reputation-tarnishing rumors and possibly an STD. You can count on that.
For those with PhotoCrank
For the haters that don't
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